And salty.
Though he was the size of a tater,
Mick's dick was a true multi-stater,
The minute he came to town,
All the girls gath'red round,
And his junk arrived ten minutes later.
Though he was the size of a tater,
There once was a pirate Somali
statements like "I haven't peed since Milwaukee" will totally lose their impact.
The finest fellatrix on Earth
There once was a hooker from Boston
In line and patiently waitin'
Her deluxe vibrator, "Sir Jolts",
There once was a burly Sri Lankar,
Blessed are those who've retired,
There once was a goatmaiden, simple but pretty, who came to see the wizard under most distressing circumstances. She had made the four day walk to the castle in a little under seven days -- fine time for a one-footed dwarf -- and, per usual, pleaded for the wizard's assistance.
She asked me why I got into this business.
Delectable, flexible Rose,
Labels: limerick
He spoke at her with his loud, over-articulate voice -- one she presumed he also used with animals and plants, to whom English is not a native language.
Wherein problems with the living dead pretty much take care of themselves.
"Hi, I'm Debbie ... where y'all from?"
that pained him so much about a complete system reinstall,
We hugged in the weightlessness of space,
It was hard to imagine, given the extended stretch of asphalt traveled, that six hours of driving could pass without notice. Previously, the silence between CDs would have announced each hourish block, but it seemed my iPod had yet again made consciousness unnecessary. Still, the stocky fields outside my window confirmed my location within the agrarian sealand of Illinois, if not an errant wormhole somewhere between Michigan and St. Louis (the sort a traveler may enter with less noticeable effect than the conclusion of the Downward Spiral album).
Dear Heavenly Father,
"Oh, I didn't know you were using the NuvaRing," she blurted, suddenly remembering her own string of bad experiences with every other contraceptive known to womankind, "did you experience any side effects?"

It was no misogynistic mystery why gender roles had evolved to protect Hank from laundering. He was clumsy and oafish; a woman's garments were stringy and sheer. Transferring them from washer to dryer had all the potential of juggling honey.
when he came to recognize neighbors by lint.
Chuck won their argument with his usual technique: pretending to think deeply for about twenty seconds until she dozed off.
"Dog Eat Dog" on Channel 55
"I think Burning Man has jumped the shark," he said, catching a sad glimpse of his grandmother's psychedelic airbrushed tits.
In small-town USA, a new wind stirs. Signs have appeared all around this simple village; portents of an approaching phenomenon. Wheatpasted on barns and five-and-dimes are announcements of an inbound traveler, one Professor Schwan, and his "AMAZING!" "STUPENDOUS!" "MUST-BE-SEEN-TO-BE-BELIEVED (AND MAYBE NOT EVEN THEN)!!!" mystery: the Gastrofantasmapromenautomaton.
Drunk #1: "What'll it be? Sleep or White Castle Crave Case?"
"When I saw my beautiful new home I almost began to cry.
It was Friday night, and he didn't have any real responsibilities, yet Steve found himself wishing Ben would stick to the schedule. It felt kind of unappreciative, somehow, to fuss over time that was free time; like winning a lifetime supply of cookies and demanding milk. This, of course, was silly: most of Steve's time was free and most of the time he drank beer.
two days after his by-pass surgery, Richard is on the road to recovery, and Rory returns to Yale, where she finds that Richard's economics class is now being taught by an attractive young TA, Tucker Culbertson, who flusters Rory with his charm. While Lorelai tries to distract herself from the issues in her marriage, she and Sookie focus on planning a funeral for one of Michel's beloved dogs. Finally, Christopher returns ready to talk, and he and Lorelai discuss the main problem that has haunted their marriage – Lorelai's feelings for Luke. On Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, after a young girl is found dead in the apartment of a vacationing couple with no children, Stabler and Benson soon learn that there have been a number of high school students having floating parties, going from house to house and getting drunk. Unfortunately, charging any of the teens with murder proves problematic, but the detectives get a break when they learn that one of the teen's mothers had been providing the alcohol as well as sleeping with one of the students. On Beauty and the Geek, one of the women is in tears when she must work the Dewey Decimal System. On Grey's Anatomy, Callie and George make a big decision. A successor to Chief Webber is named. A man named Jeff Pope arrives. He is looking for his wife and newborn child. Cristina and Burke's wedding day has arrived and so have the interns first-year exam results.
"Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.
, wherein the system of trial-by-jury proves its reliability by making its participants, in the moments before employ, even more stupid.
Confounding, spontaneous, random query posed by my presumably lucid grandmother.
if ns < np then j
Energetic child at Target: " ... and here's what our dogs eat!"
Excuse offered by my smarmy former landlord for grossly delinquent return of security deposit.
In what continues to distract from meritorious scientific argument regarding the theory of anthropogenic global warming, experts from both sides of the debate are regularly outed as shills for biased industrial or political concerns. In 2006, IPCC panelists intent on downplaying the impact of global warming were connected to monies from fossil fuel companies. Now, two scientists predicting the gravest consequences of our warming world have likewise been found of dubious predilection.
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